|
AREA 47
Turbo-Phrase 4
+Warning: Turbo-Phrase Lists contain
Extremely Offensive Terms!+
+Proceed At Your Own Risk!+
Boys will talk when the girl leaves the
room. Blacks have a few things to say about whitey.
Wanna join a gang? Dis the non-gang members! Want to be
cool, find somebody to put-down. So you say you'd like to join
the Power-Clique? Start by making fun of the losers. If
the Power-People laugh, you're in! Language gets pushed to the
limit in the search for creative new ways to insult. Best is
when you slight someone, and they don't even notice, like when a
Black man calls a white man: "Jack."
In the current Ultra Politically Correct
climate (circa 2005) people put-on their public-face and tip-toe
around the ugly hard Truth whispering pretty cotton-candy
false-impressions to non-group members. The trash-talk picks
up the moment the insiders get rid of the outsider.
Because this is a Writer's Resource, and
not an attempt to offend or insult anyone, I am going to pull the
worst 10% off this list. If you really want the unexpurgated
list, write me at hg47@a47.info
and I will send you a link to George Carlin's Seven Dirty Words, and
a shit-load of bad-ass Turbo-Fecal-Phrases he didn't mention.
Even at 90%, I'm sure a lot of people
will be offended. I'm sorry! I could cut it back to 50%,
just leaving in the whisper of pretty cotton-candy, but then it
wouldn't be much of a Writer's Resource.
Contains Language Spoken By Pimps & Rap
Stars
Language Offensive to
Women
Blacks
Catholics
Men
Jews
Straights
Gays
WASPs
Asians
And Short People
JAP = Jewish American
Princess
the peace symbol = the footprint of the American chicken
in the cheerful gift wrap of nostalgia
“Your face has to go to jail; it’s the mood police.”
Bob the-immortal-adenoid Dylan
“Like, can you dig it, the whole riff, you know, tell it like it is,
pick up on the heavy vibes because there’s this far-out thing that’s
going down, if you know where I’m coming from.”
accidentally picking up hitchhiking Manson girls
Women who thought they “might be a witch.”
Today’s college students majoring in Comparative Greed.
It used to be TURN ON, TUNE IN, DROP OUT; now you need a laptop:
OPTIMIZE NETWORKING, IMPACT DATA INTERFACE, EFFECT CORE DUMP.
love, real old-fashioned
L-U-V love!
somewhere in the butt end of the third world
“A lot of people out there still think EASY RIDER had a happy
ending.”
“This is a tougher ghetto
bunch, hardened by twenty more years of drugs, hopeless poverty, and
torture by government welfare agencies--we rile this bunch and we’re
liable to get our ass handed us in a BMW hubcap!”
“He burned his hand on the hot rear end of a radiation dancer.”
Jefferson Airplane = a roach clip
jelly-on-springs = large, bouncing & quivering boobs or buttocks
“reunion with an alarm clock”
(Borg)
“My love has been declared a disaster area.”
“It tasted like victory on the battlefield.” (Borg)
like packages with insufficient postage (Borg)
it’s like a universal forwarding address (Borg)
Reed slides his hand down Courtney’s underwear: “Show me your poem.”
jism = semen = gism, jizz
capernoited = tipsy, lightly pifflecated, slightly nimptopsical
that’s the way the ball bounces = that’s the way the cookie
crumbles, that’s the way the car crashes, that’s the way the
computer crashes, that’s the relationship goes to ruin
a whole new ball of wax = a whole different TV channel
goofy
mummified decade
mnemonic brain cells
communal toothbrushes
dark nuclear bar
white velvet seat
jar-head = fool, oaf
jeff = a whitey
vending machine = whore
slow motion blues
serene exhaustion
stench
back from the crypt
the mood police
swinish
atomic waste water beer
jasper = a lesbian
jazzed-up
jerk bumps = acne
sugar pop woman
bloated
cigarette butt people
weirdola maximo chops
psychotic amnesiac
mellow to death
radiation girls
God’s limousine
jay = joint
Jeez
quick-tan tourists
hold hands in the dark
vague & dull
the limbo of lost mail
card trick
jimmie = to shake
barbecued Beelzebub
my cerebral butt hurts
jingumbobs = balls
jizz = semen, manly vigor
hand-job
knob-job
skull-job = oral sex
too pooped to pop
like a bat out of hell
lust radiation
jolly = drunk
jughead = a fool or oaf
juicy = sexually hot girl
in her mousiest mode
high-octane blond
sleazeball
deglamourization
razzmatazz
endearing bumpkins
love-tokens
short as a dream
devour
lover’s flights
mother-jumper
keyhole of love
drab out
rock-a-bye
klepto = compulsive thief
knick-knack
initiator
detonator
centrifuge
reducer
extruder
pure romance
silk organza dream dress
altar-bound
sequin-bedewed lace
saucy bride
having a blast
lady-killer
utopian women
fabricked rear end
super-
lavender boy
ball-buster
hotwire the neighbor’s wife
promising a sexual trip to
the moon
rotate the tires
jewels = balls
jiggered = drunk
writer’s block
spiritually burned
women with wet eyes
genie (in a bottle)
The dude’s got jizz.
head-job
pipe-job (head)
rim-job
jingle-berries = balls
going great guns
big daddy
sunburn lovers
joy-bag = condom
jugs = breasts
on-the-cheap B movie
fleetingly suicidal
with shtick to spare
prissy
trusting tot
fragile tyrant
puppy lust
lay siege
brief as the lightning
quick bright things
base and vile
Khyber Pass = ass
fresh cut dreams
middle class savage
klutz
catlap = a weak drink
annunciator
plane
vibrator
integrator
doldrums
ruffle, flutter
smooth bodice
crazy little pretender
nubile form
giggly & wiggly
ladies’ lollipop = dick
lolly-gag = goof around
on the way to success
solar sand
lard ball = fat person
lay
bed-bug
Jesus freak
jimmies = the shakes
deadlock
herpes souvenir
a very pink behind
jive-stick = joint
brown-job
hum-job
piston-job
sex-job = foxy chick
John Barleycorn = whisky
bark up the wrong tree
Kleenex walls
jollies = sexual pleasure
joy-stick = dick
juice
splendiferous
fickle lover
farfetched
showstopping glitz
naughty knack
army of enemies
withering
swift as a shadow
jaws of darkness
liquid pearl
“Ke-rist!”
kibosh = nonsense
Wacko City
pack a nookie lunch
knave = rascal
blast off
compactor
exciter
suppressor
retractor
nostalgic bride
embellishment
white wonderworks
pretty package
shimmeriest satin
chic & sexy
ladylike
lamebrain
soon-to-be
super
lavender = queer
alley cat
half wounded gamin, half
hostile harpy
past-perfect in Victorian linen
tucked, gussied, and lace lavished
a drift of reembroidered Alencon lace
bowed and streamered bride
strapless bodice swathed in taffeta tied in dramatic backsweep
skirt ends in double ruffles
of sheer point d’esprit
fresh and flirty and nonstop
its skirt a luxuriant whirl buoyed by crinoline
fetching as a fresh gardenia
taffeta and tulle creation ruffled, pouffled, bustled, and
tail-feathered Reed’s Bently convertible time machine
machine-gunned by the EPA
“What’s this? A computer fart?” (absurdly incorrect bill)
Lavender convention = bunch of queers
now threatened by the wrecking ball
mealy-mouthed bureaucrats
“New leather jackets are definitely not happening!”
I’ll bet you dollars to donuts
BITE THE BALLS WRESTLING
He’s got 13 sisters! Can you imagine looking at 26 boobs!!
A ski-lodge fire glinting on champagne glasses.
They really know how to stuff a wild hot tub.
pay ranges from skimpy to zilch
a sky full of clouds the size of cathedrals
dreadful, with no taste and less intelligence
lacking in content and almost sinister in design
sexist, fascist, stroppy, untalented, arrogant, mercenary,
manipulative, elitist, despicably commercial and wholly egocentric,
and a young Barry Manilow
uncharacteristically hesitant
his future’s so cool he’s gotta wear gloves
the phantasmal black beast
aural beauty that sends shivers to the soul
uncorks a night to remember
a sensual ordeal of terrible clarity
cold-cocked by the savage mood
fickle Brat Pack clientele
successful enough to survive transplantation
“If you want to talk, she will rag your ear.”
a lot of high-minded hoodoo
a torrid jungleland of the libido
plush
romantic fare
“Shore ’nuff.”
noted bohemian
booty they’ve looted
ebullient
party-bound revelers
teensy, itsy-bitsy
a model’s-eye view
an arrogant, bastard
thought factory
back on his home turf
rebel rouser
smokes-and-cerveza buzz
dunderheaded Swede
as a precursor
the twilight ride
Montana whores = sheep
artist or airhead?
tacky & tastless
guest appearance
an unannounced blitz
mustachioed mouth
steely, pale-blue eyes
his thousand yard stare
unbelievable charisma
Averagetown USA
a two-peckered billygoat
a real bimbo
needle-nose boots
an appropriate euphemism
troglodyte
private bugaboos
executed
hollow bust
kick off the day
maniacally noisy
coming attractions
empty fortune cookie
ass-man
life-preserver = penis
“Like hell!”
like pigs in shit = happy
liquefied = drunk
ratty hair
lower-class-awful
out of the vinyl deeps
gold-lame
going off his nut
heaped with food
baroque stimuli
churning
motifs
buttocks décolletage
bouffant hair
dinkiness
pale-eyed
nuts on pills
skipping & screaming
shadowboxing with fate
boomerang
lumpen-bourgeoisie
fortune cookie love affair
“They’re going to build a parking lot on his personality.”
legalized prostitution =
marriage
legally lassoed = married
light bulb = pregnant girl
lingual osculation = to kiss with the tongue exploring the mouth
Lipton’s = poor grade of
grass
lower class creeps & nutballs
the big wiseacre = asshole
that patient arch of the eyebrows brushoff
Reed’s senses were at a high pitch of excitation
bombardment of the senses
the magnitude of the achievement
quixotic inflammation of the senses
magnifies it, foliates it, embellishes it into an institution
whimsical,
Yale-seminar-frenzied devices
stretch-pant-swathed little bottom
electrochemical pastels: tangerine, broiling magenta, livid pink,
incardadine, fuchsia demure, Congo ruby, methyl green, viridine,
aquamarine, phenosafranine, incandescent orange, scarlet-fever
purple, cyanic blue, tessellated bronze, hospital-fruit-basket
orange
permanently dour look
suburban stoners
physical throb
grim carnal grace
sonic Epicureanism
bare-breasted
erstwhile
used razor blades
a bulldozer divorce
tit-man
lewdster
lickspit = slicker of spit
like a bat out of hell
like hell on stilts
lily-liver = coward
lion drunk
liquid-fire = bad whisky
Nut Heaven
rancid people
immune to subtle looks
thatch-work hair
electric-sign gauntlet
sunbursts
exotic acoustics
electronic stimulation
jest
little high-school buds
Protestant rectitude
fizzed
obligingly explaining
never-never land
breasts aimed up
electronic wheeps
fat & phlegmatic
narcoleptic hour
smoothed by a smile
bubblegum bombshell
strangled siren wails
gutter laments
majestic
hip eateries
hoodlum kitty
nicked edges
leg-man
bestial
like hell on wheels
lioness = harlot
somnambulistic
Nutty!
the super-hyper-version
his singsong
this big goof
buffet tables
toxic schizophrenia
old babes
soar
flophouses & sauna baths
convened
giddy prospect
gloriously refuted
roughhousers
a covey of girls
their glutei maximi
wheeps, beeps & freeps
Los Angeles biggie
the entire chick ensemble =
all her clothes
somebody’s earnest breadwinner
loaded with the right credentials
their heads exploding in platinum-and-neon-yellow bouffants and
raspberry-silk scarves
eyes appliquéd in black like
mail-order decals
the latest shipment of actresses to LA
electronic wheeps, beeps & lulus
the giddiness of electronic jollification
with his eyes looking like two poached eggs engraved with a road map
of West Virginia after all night at the poker table
chainsaw psychedelic punk
liver-turner = penis = kidney-scraper, lung-disturber
the rock-star-turned-actor bit
burned higher-octane _____
everyone in the vicinity of a typewriter banged out praise for the
show someone has turned on the air conditioning to the point where
it will be remembered
titillations of the winking crotch
sex riding the crest of the future
bare-bottomed Cosmonaughties
an old babe with decaying haunches
“I think it’s past your bedtime, sweets.”
loafing, idling, lollygagging
roaring through the dawn into the next day
sempiternal wading pool (eternal)
he unveils the little art-nouveau curves in his psyche and calls for
two girls to perform acts upon one another
“Hey babe, wanna look at the ceiling over my shoulder?”
walking dandruff = a louse
love-lane = vagina = love’s channel , love’s fountain, love’s
harbor, love’s paradise, love’s pavilion
a slightly deranged lion on the loose
“By the time I get home, I am burnt toast--anybody’s lunch meat.
It’s very hard on the wife unit.”
“There was a time in my career that I damn near OD’d on penicillin
. . . ’Nuff said.”
TV = birth control for the mind
fluctuating between blissed-out & bedraggled
peaked-ceiling master bedroom
ignite already short fuses
servin’ suds behind the bar
you’re stuck out in the middle of some scenic country spot side-steppin’
cow flop
“Before you tuck yourself in . . .”
“You doing them funny diet aids again?”
Partyin’ until we’re prone.
barn burner = exciting event
box = medical for die
“Any action in 612?”
“Yeah, he boxed around
midnight.”
main mellow = steady
boyfriend or girlfriend
aural hygiene
sabotaging
bankrupt
scraps
preys
scavenging sounds
tight thighs
he has a control thing
under the _____ umbrella
jokey, whirligig style
overachiever’s sweat
swinging-single’s smirk
choir of demons
a surfeit of
loins
loony
water on fire
placid face
bubblegum in hair
love weed = grass
lewd but lovable
numbers-nonentity
change is having a baby
not-so-demurely
ritual ego clashes
party site
aging gene
bicoastal
maggot-brained
on the make
CEO
“Sweet mama!”
downstream
musty soul
metropolitan deliverance
half trained
skewer
lionhearted portrayal
Fluke City
master member = penis
deep pocket = party in a lawsuit with the most money
machine violations on human life
fart = ranky ripper, roaring rumbler, delirious doozer, blazing
bomber, slippery sizzler, sloppy slurper, loose goose, britches
buster
the streets were festooned
an annum to last the millennium
last seen eating lime Jell-O at the Betty Ford clinic
still playing at midnight on Saturdays at the Hell Plaza Octoplex
a grubby, grotesque excursion into religioso psychodrama
The guy asked Groucho Marx
what the essence of humor was.
Groucho leaned over and cut
off the guy’s tie.
At the gambling table: “Goodbye, Mr. Chip.”
the spirit of reckless abandon
EAS System = Electronic article surveillance (tags on clothes)
ETS = environmental tobacco smoke
“Nag, nag, nag.”
robotic pulse
liquored-up
fenced-in teeth = braces
space cadet
belligerent
frat boy on benzedrine
rivers of perspiration
gauzy glamour poses
bombardment
snigger
ladies’ lollypop = penis
loose-love lady = whore
bake in the sand
wooden peg arm & leg
hangover heaven
low-brow
zoo crew
yup-pup
banana-brained bimbo
in baby-boom heaven
winging it
shit happens
“Hey, babes, come here!”
Apple Democrat
big-ticket = expensive
magic wand = penis
make a deposit
checkbook journalism
dancercise
the Black Bart of Love
nuclear barbecue
the Clinton era is kaput
she’s a superior sport
electric boogie
disjointed feeling
doomsday vocals
slender cinnamon legs
junkyard owner
nerve-wracked human being
smugfest <sic>
nightmarish
shoehorned into
sun-cracked
old babehood
razzle-dazzle
loony bin
poetry commission
sunburned & stiff
“You tickle me.”
This city has halitosis.
Lowlife
babe in the boys’ club
Top 40-Winks
more pregnant than ever
cooing
volatile
this little whatzit here
the Brit split
Bambi syndrome
blow it off = cancel
thingamajig
cash cow
checkbook airplay
downscale
worn-out prayer
urban excitement
local tap-water women
the siecle is fin
roped into the fray
electrofunk
master of ceremonies = penis
big dick = donkey-rigged, hung, hung like a bull, miracle-meat,
well-hung
love often comes with strings
attached
About as subtle as a mile-long strip of billboards
gorilla = a high-powered block-buster film, record, book, etc.
granola = an earthy, unconventional, self-designed dude
high-five = two right hands exuberantly slapping together
“He plays key trumpet.” <key = very good, the best>
la langue du Coca-Cola = a scoffing French term for the
English language milquetoast = a shy coward; an effeminate male
minx = a forward girl or a whore
misanthrope = a hater of all mankind
mixoscopia = sexual excitement from watching a sexual act
awards are headlights stapled to your chest (Dylan)
throw rocks at the window
phenomenally uncharismatic
put it on automatic pilot
Legs = a film’s staying power
loopy = eccentric, daffy, slightly crazy
moist around the edges = drunk
mego = my eyes glaze over / “the mego factor”
other appurtenances for the executive road warrior
sustenance for the journey
muppie = middle-aged urban professional
net-net = final, last word
morning pride = morning erection
passive smoking; ETS = environmental tobacco smoke; secondhand
smoke; sidestream smoke; radon daughters
prequel = a sequel that happens historically before
first strike
gateway drug = grass
macrophallus
mental midget
post-Yuppie
Va-Va-Voom!
golden handcuffs
eating hummingbird-style
microphallus
miracle-meat = big dick
a new scam
his baby blues ablaze
non-stop style
molehills = tiny tits
money-maker = cunt
mediagenic
a sense of panache
rusty-blade rasp
it rains
“By jingle!”
terminal cutesification
nose candy = cocaine
fuzzword
gender gap
mell of a hess
trendproof
Yup-tent = Yuppie condo
achingly beautiful
diamond handcuffs
whippersnapper
hypermarket
mind in the mud
mobility impaired person
unthreateningly handsome
Boy Scout integrity
gravity defying
money = vagina
male bonding
me generation
Whatdafuck?
numb nuts
prayer outbreak
boutiqueification
nuclear winter
mother-grabber
elegant gobbledegook
megalopenis
fell of a hix
trendproof guide
postparty depression
coolly kinetic
golden handshake
micropenis
milky-way = breasts
mind in the gutter
a growth business
virile confidence
telly titan
log off
money-box = cunt
maximinimalism
misery index
a wee bit
motormouth
bankification
mother-ugly = super ugly
pay-per-view
pixel
muck
mumbo-jumbo
rocumentary = movideo
mutual masturbation
sweetly old-fashioned
tangy
scuzz
nature-boy
sunblock
techie = technician
nookie
blast away
blind leading the blind
blow a gasket
blow your cool
blow over = to end
blow up
beat the rap
user friendly
nubile = fit for marriage
number one = piss
numbskull
nymph
Ruppie = young urban Republican
Rustbelt = Northeast & North-Central United States
mysophilia = sexual interest aroused by excretion
NABU = nonadjustable bails-up
(mess)
nail two bellies together
sandwich music = a blend of jazz & rock
significant other = lover
sinsemilla = seedless hybrid marijuana with l0x the THC
skell = vagrant, homeless, and usually eccentric or insane person
skotey = spoiled kid of the
eighties
slime = to wipe out in an unpleasant manner; “I’ve been slimed.”
“They slimed it.”
navel engagement = copulation
Spanglish = half-Hex, half-gringo talk; like Nuevo York
spin control = the effort of a press agent or public relations
expert to impart a favorable slant, or spin, to a news story
relating to a client. Such a practitioner is a spin doctor.
Stick it = to land on one’s
feet—literally or figuratively—solidly and effortlessly (from
gymnastics)
“How was your first day on
the job?”
“Great! I stuck it.”
Tablescape = objects
decorated on a table
Nimble-hipped = super-active
and agile in copulation
Toyetic = having the
potential for being transplanted into a popular toy
Nocturnal pollution = a wet
dream
Blood is thicker than water
mother-lover
sneaks = sneakers
peewee
plastic money
muck-heap
quartz-halogen lamp
on a roll
“My stars!”
flirtatious & flouncy
microskirts & maxi-cling
scuzzball
Neanderthal
sysop = system operator
nincompoop
nose-picker
blaze a trail
blood runs cold
blow your top
blow your mind
blow the lid off it
bear the brunt
dumb like a fox
vaporization
nudnik = a pest
number three = sperm off
“He’s off his nut!”
nymphet
mother-rucker
palsy-walsy = friendly
Peter Pan syndrome
movies = diarrhea
muh-fuh
Reaganaut
muttonhead
nail = to copulate
vibrant, hot-blooded
snap happy paparazzi
nards = balls
squeeze = lover
tapped out = without money
nitwit
cherubimical = drunk
blind alley
blow a fuse
blow your stack
toot your own horn
blow the whistle on
beat around the bush
macho man & richo wife
not worth a damn
“cute little number”
number two = bowel mov.
“Nuts!”
nympho
blow in = arrive unexpectedly
(“. . . when Bill blew in.”)
blow into = to arrive (When did you blow into town?)
run-of-the-record Grammy-winning vocalist
wax = to defeat (“I haven’t been waxed like this in years!”)
“The waxing of Walter
Mondale.”
nudomania = abnormal desire to be naked
nuptial = bridal; pertaining to marriage
nymph of darkness = whore
nymph of the pavement, nymph of the pave = prostitute
Courtney’s writing: “It drops out of my sleeve while I’m holding the
pencil.”
gasoline powered iambic
pentameter
He wore the tux as if he were about to roll up the sleeves and fix a
truck.
beauty is in the eye of the
beholder
bed of roses, less thorns
born with a silver spoon in his mouth
born with a silver spoon up his ass
conventional = standard, ordinary, regular
enhanced = new, improved
advanced = new and expensive
isomorphic = similar
allotropic = different
wonk = bookworm, an unattractive one, a grind, sporting a plastic
nerd pack for pens and wearing glasses repaired with adhesive tape
yup-com = a sit-com TV show aimed at yuppies
“Is she fast?”
“She’s a Zip+4 girl!”
lookin’ to glom the biker image
let-it-all-hang-out exuberance
a sexy honey showin’ her stuff
with that hydrocarbon circus lumbering behind me grinding gears
Twelve-gauge unfriendly, in fact.
the white-trash side of town
the stupid little kraut car
the promised land of New Jersey
|